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You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Bras
Redneck
Worn
Dress
Dresses
Ever
Might
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
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Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
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I just love people. I love this country. I am the American dream. I grew up by the airport with a dirt yard. Never in my life should I have been a success. So that's what I love about this country [USA], is you get out there and you have the opportunity and you work hard at it, and you can be a success.
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You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
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You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.
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You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
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You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
Jeff Foxworthy
