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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Might
Redneck
Hits
Floor
Girlfriend
Somebody

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
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You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!
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You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.
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Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.
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Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.
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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
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You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.
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You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
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People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
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I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
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We're a heart attack away from losing the right to bear arms.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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