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You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Might
Motel
Motels
Redneck
Lights
Coming
Turns
Light
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
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You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
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You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.
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You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
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You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
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It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.
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Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
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You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
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