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You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Motels
Redneck
Lights
Coming
Turns
Light
Might
Motel

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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
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You might be a redneck if you're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing I Will Always Love You.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
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You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
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A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
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To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
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You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.
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I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
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You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
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You might be a redneck if...you've been on TV more than times describing the sound of a tornado.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
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When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'
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You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
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