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You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
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Atlanta
Georgia
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Redneck
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Southern
Civil
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck
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You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
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You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
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If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
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You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
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People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
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You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
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If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay or married.
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What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.
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