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You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Thinking
Trial
Trials
Test
Tests
Taste
Bigs
Might
Think
Redneck

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Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
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You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
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You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
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You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
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You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.
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You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.
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If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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Talking with Gary Busey is kinda like sex. You want to do it, you just don't want to be alone when you do it.
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Sacrificing myself to kill Hilary Clinton was the best thing I could possibly do for humanity
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I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
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