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You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Consider
Quality
High
Redneck
Might
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Bugs
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Six
Entertainment
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
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You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
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You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.
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If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay or married.
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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.
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If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
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There's no down time any more.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!
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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
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A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
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If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
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I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
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