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You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Might
Events
Fight
Involved
Sports
High
Fist
Fighting
Redneck
Mother
Fists
School
Event
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
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Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
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You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
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You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
Jeff Foxworthy
I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
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You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
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You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
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If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
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You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
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You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
Jeff Foxworthy
