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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
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Toothpick
Toothpicks
Redneck
Wedding
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
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You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
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Country music is about new love and it's about old love.
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You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
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You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
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People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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