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You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Momma
Redneck
Hunting
Dress
Dresses
Best
Might
Tore

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You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
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You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.
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I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it off, but I would like to be the cowboy that rides off and someone shoots him off the horse in the middle of town. Just a serious role. It wouldn't have to be a big one.
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Talking with Gary Busey is kinda like sex. You want to do it, you just don't want to be alone when you do it.
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To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
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You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
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You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
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If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
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You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
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You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
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