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You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Needs
Tattoo
Card
Hole
Holes
Cards
Freebie
House
Punched
Might
Tattoos
Need
Redneck
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
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If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
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I just love people. I love this country. I am the American dream. I grew up by the airport with a dirt yard. Never in my life should I have been a success. So that's what I love about this country [USA], is you get out there and you have the opportunity and you work hard at it, and you can be a success.
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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
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You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
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You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
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Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
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You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Jeff Foxworthy
You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
Jeff Foxworthy
