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You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Redneck
Tanks
Gas
Running
Might
Gin
Tank

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
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I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I'd spent about half the day in the woods.
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You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
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You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
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The only negative about doing stand-up is that you're on the road by yourself. When you're on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, Can you believe they're paying us to do this? They're crazy.
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People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
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You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
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You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
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Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
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You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.
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A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
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If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.
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