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You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Gin
Tank
Redneck
Tanks
Gas
Running
Might

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I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
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Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
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You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
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You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
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If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
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If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
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I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
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You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.
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The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
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