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You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Tricks
Executes
Fingers
Reunion
Completely
Redneck
Family
Finger
Might
Trick
Grandfather
Pull

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You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I'd spent about half the day in the woods.
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You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.
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It's sad when you see somebody that talented that passes away and doesn't have to.
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Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
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To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
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As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you're going to do.
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I just love people. I love this country. I am the American dream. I grew up by the airport with a dirt yard. Never in my life should I have been a success. So that's what I love about this country [USA], is you get out there and you have the opportunity and you work hard at it, and you can be a success.
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You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
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You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
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Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
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You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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