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You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Might
Federal
Thing
Agents
Alcohol
Lose
Bureau
Leave
Firearms
Loses
Redneck
Worry
Tobacco
House
Followed
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I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
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People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.
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You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.
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You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.
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