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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Wife
Budweiser
Stop
Redneck
Might
Station
Gas
Stations
Clock
Wall
Wants
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There's no down time any more.
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You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
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You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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Sacrificing myself to kill Hilary Clinton was the best thing I could possibly do for humanity
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You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.
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I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.
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You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
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If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.
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The only negative about doing stand-up is that you're on the road by yourself. When you're on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, Can you believe they're paying us to do this? They're crazy.
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Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
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