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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Redneck
Watches
Watch
House
Littles
Little
Decorating
Might
Prairie
Tips

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.
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You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
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You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
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You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
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You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
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If you're a man and you've ever been antique shopping during a big football game, you're either gay or married.
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You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
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You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
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You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
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Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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Comics don't usually have very long careers, and I'm 22 years into this.
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You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
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If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
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I really don't require a whole lot in life.
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My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.
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