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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Clothes
Satellite
Kids
Satellites
School
Dish
Might
Redneck
Payment
Delay
Dishes
Buying
Delays
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.
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What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.
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I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it off, but I would like to be the cowboy that rides off and someone shoots him off the horse in the middle of town. Just a serious role. It wouldn't have to be a big one.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
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Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
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You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
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You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
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People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
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Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
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You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
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I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
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You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
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We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.
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