Quote

You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Kids
Satellites
School
Dish
Might
Redneck
Payment
Delay
Dishes
Buying
Delays
Clothes
Satellite

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You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
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You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
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The biggest thing I've learned is to listen to my own gut. I have learned to trust my instincts.
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You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
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You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
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Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.
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You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.
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You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
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You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
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I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it off, but I would like to be the cowboy that rides off and someone shoots him off the horse in the middle of town. Just a serious role. It wouldn't have to be a big one.
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
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You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.
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You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
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Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
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You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.
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You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
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