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You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Announcements
Redneck
Included
Rats
Birth
Word
Might
Announcement
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
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If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right
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You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
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The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
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You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
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You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
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You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.
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Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
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You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
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You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
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You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.
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You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
Jeff Foxworthy
