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You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Redneck
Sink
Kitchen
Use
Might
Radiator
Hose

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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
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You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.
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You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
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You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.
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I just love people. I love this country. I am the American dream. I grew up by the airport with a dirt yard. Never in my life should I have been a success. So that's what I love about this country [USA], is you get out there and you have the opportunity and you work hard at it, and you can be a success.
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
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You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
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You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
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I talked to Larry the Cable Guy the other day. Larry's made more money than 10 people should ever make in a lifetime. He was excited because he'd gone over to the livestock auction and bought 20 new feeder pigs.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
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You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
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