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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Point
Away
Gotten
Everything
Clock
Even
Watches
Thinking
News
Watch
Walk
Walks

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
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You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
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Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.
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You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
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Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
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You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
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You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
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You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
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You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You don't get married to get sex. Getting married to get sex is like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
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I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
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If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!
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You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
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