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I've gotten to the point I won't even watch the 11 o'clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
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Gotten
Everything
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News
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
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You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
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You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
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You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?
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You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
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You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
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You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
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You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
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Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.
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The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
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