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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Thinking
Generation
World
Case
Sex
Generations
Wouldn
Stupidest
Cases
Invented
Even
Assumption
Every
Thinks
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
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You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.
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You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
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You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
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Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.
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You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
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I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
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A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
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You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
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Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
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We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.
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