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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Ever
Ceiling
Might
Ceilings
Redneck
Ruined
Humor
Fans
Wife
Hairdo
Funny
Hairdos

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You may be a redneck if . . . you think you are an entrepreneur because of the Dirt for Sale sign in the front yard.
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I really don't require a whole lot in life.
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As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.
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You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
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If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them!
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You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
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Comics don't usually have very long careers, and I'm 22 years into this.
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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
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You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
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You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
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Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist.
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It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.
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You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
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If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new Darrell Waltrip Budweiser wall clock.
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You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
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