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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
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Atlanta
Georgia
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Universe
Mysteries
Stuff
Thirty
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Nine
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.
Jeff Foxworthy
A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
Jeff Foxworthy
If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
Jeff Foxworthy
[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
Jeff Foxworthy
If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.
Jeff Foxworthy
Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
Jeff Foxworthy
I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
Jeff Foxworthy
