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As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you're going to do.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Decide
Appreciate
Comedy
Going
Every
Kind
Comedian
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
If you can't remember the last time you had sex with a woman, you're either gay, or married.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
Jeff Foxworthy
I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if in an effort to watch your cholesterol, you eat Spam Lite.
Jeff Foxworthy
Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you refer to the time you won a free case of oil as the day my ship came in.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.
Jeff Foxworthy
If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
Jeff Foxworthy
You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.
Jeff Foxworthy
We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
Jeff Foxworthy
Kids aren't suppose to have cancer, they're suppose to have a future.
Jeff Foxworthy
I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
Jeff Foxworthy
Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
Jeff Foxworthy
