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The only negative about doing stand-up is that you're on the road by yourself. When you're on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, Can you believe they're paying us to do this? They're crazy.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Stand
Night
Crack
Going
Comics
Every
Cracks
Believe
Paying
Road
Negative
Crazy
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
Jeff Foxworthy
If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck
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You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
Jeff Foxworthy
I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
Jeff Foxworthy
Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
Jeff Foxworthy
Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
Jeff Foxworthy
People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
Jeff Foxworthy
I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
Jeff Foxworthy
People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
Jeff Foxworthy
Country music is about new love and it's about old love.
Jeff Foxworthy
