Quote

I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it off, but I would like to be the cowboy that rides off and someone shoots him off the horse in the middle of town. Just a serious role. It wouldn't have to be a big one.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Love
Serious
Town
Like
Middle
Offer
Bigs
Towns
Someone
Horse
Part
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Shoots
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Cowboy
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.
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If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
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The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
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You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.
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You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
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The only negative about doing stand-up is that you're on the road by yourself. When you're on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, Can you believe they're paying us to do this? They're crazy.
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You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
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You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
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Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
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The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
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You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.
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My wife is like, You finally get your own TV show, you can have any kind of car you want and you get a darned truck. But my brother and I have the same kind of truck now.
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You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.
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