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If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Might
Deduction
Bail
Deductions
Redneck
Biggest
Taxes
Money
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
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Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
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If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?
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You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.
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My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
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You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
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You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
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It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.
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You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
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You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work.
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
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You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.
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If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
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