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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Funny
Hard
Years
Think
Thinking
Loser
Humor
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
Jeff Foxworthy
Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
Jeff Foxworthy
I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
Jeff Foxworthy
As a comic, you learn to use your voice because you don't have the benefit of visual things.
Jeff Foxworthy
As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you're going to do.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
Jeff Foxworthy
Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
Jeff Foxworthy
We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
Jeff Foxworthy
Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
Jeff Foxworthy
I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication
Jeff Foxworthy
I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
Jeff Foxworthy
I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you'll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
Jeff Foxworthy
A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, 'I'm just dating my sister and couldn't swear that it wasn't a weather balloon.'
Jeff Foxworthy
People are like, Hey, Jeff, lemme tell you... I'm like, Hold on, let me get a pen and a piece of paper.
Jeff Foxworthy
