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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Loser
Humor
Funny
Hard
Years
Think
Thinking
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
Jeff Foxworthy
You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
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I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
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The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
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You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.
Jeff Foxworthy
I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.
Jeff Foxworthy
If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
Jeff Foxworthy
It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.
Jeff Foxworthy
