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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Loser
Humor
Funny
Hard
Years
Think
Thinking
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
Comics don't usually have very long careers, and I'm 22 years into this.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
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You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
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If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
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You break into my house, I will shoot you. My wife will shoot you and then spend thirty minutes telling you why she shot you.
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It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
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You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
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You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
Jeff Foxworthy
If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
Jeff Foxworthy
Country music is about new love and it's about old love.
Jeff Foxworthy
Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
Jeff Foxworthy
We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.
Jeff Foxworthy
