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I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take after the other side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
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Atlanta
Georgia
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America
Percent
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More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
Jeff Foxworthy
If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
You know that you are a teacher when you spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
Jeff Foxworthy
I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.
Jeff Foxworthy
It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
Jeff Foxworthy
You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to learn how to shoot chickens out of a cannon at the windshield of an airplane, 'cause there would have been a line at my school to do that!
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
Jeff Foxworthy
I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When shes in a good mood it turns blue, but when shes in a bad mood theres a red mark across my forehead
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.
Jeff Foxworthy
If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
Jeff Foxworthy
What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.
Jeff Foxworthy
To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
Jeff Foxworthy
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
Jeff Foxworthy
