Quote

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Little
Watching
Children
Doors
Like
Baby
Coming
Bernard
Funny
Wet
Born
Cat
Kids
Dog
Littles
Door

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If most people wanted to be incognito, they put on a fake beard or mustache. If I wanted to I'd just shave mine off.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
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Country music is about new love and it's about old love.
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If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
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You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.
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I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it's kind of an acknowledgment that you've been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
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If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'
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I talked to Larry the Cable Guy the other day. Larry's made more money than 10 people should ever make in a lifetime. He was excited because he'd gone over to the livestock auction and bought 20 new feeder pigs.
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