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If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
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Voice Actor
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Atlanta
Georgia
Ever
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Redneck
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Plate
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Offering
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To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.
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You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
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You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
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If men have a smell it's usually an accident.
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You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
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I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away.
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You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.
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It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
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You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
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You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.
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You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right
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I would love for someone to offer me a serious part in something. I don't know if I could even pull it off, but I would like to be the cowboy that rides off and someone shoots him off the horse in the middle of town. Just a serious role. It wouldn't have to be a big one.
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Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
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I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.
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