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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

Jeff Foxworthy

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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Stand
Goal
Funny
May
Fireworks
Redneck
Lifetime
Humor
Comedy

More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

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You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
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I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script.
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There's no down time any more.
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If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
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I've got keys to crap I've never owned. You put all my keys together I could be a high school janitor tonight.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Every generation thinks they invented sex, which is the stupidest assumption in the world because if that was the case, you wouldn't even be here.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn't go to the colleges he got guys off the fishing docks.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Children that play outside develop better problem solving skills and have a stronger ability to work within a group.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.
Jeff Foxworthy
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You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
Jeff Foxworthy