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You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
Jeff Foxworthy
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Jeff Foxworthy
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: September 6
Actor
Comedian
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Voice Actor
Writer
Atlanta
Georgia
Much
Value
Humor
Goes
Comedy
Redneck
Values
Depending
Funny
Truck
Might
Gas
Book
Blue
More quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
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Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it?
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It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
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You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
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You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.
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You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.
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The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
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The things that I'm talking about not knowing, they're not mysteries of the universe it's just stuff I thought I would know by the time I was thirty-nine.
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You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
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The thing about that singles apartment is you never had to clean it up... until the day you got the security deposit back. You're arguing with the landlord... 'No sir, the back door was missing when we moved in here! The pizzas were always on the ceiling!'
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We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.
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Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? You put on something from the cleaners, they're gonna spit up just like that. My wardrobe looks like we have condors living in our yard.
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You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.
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You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
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You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
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If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.
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You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.
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You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.
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You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.
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You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.
Jeff Foxworthy
