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I have arranged my little life.

Jean Rhys

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Jean Rhys
Age: 88 †
Born: 1890
Born: August 24
Died: 1979
Died: May 14
Novelist
Writer
Ella Gwendolen Rees Williams
Ella Rees Williams
Life
Arranged
Littles
Little

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The musty smell, the bugs, the lonliness, this room, which is part of the street outside-this is all I want from life.
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I like shape very much. A novel has to have shape, and life doesn't have any.
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When I think about it, if I had to choose, I'd rather be happy than write.
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She had left me thirsty and all my life would be thirst and longing for what I had lost before I found it.
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I am sad, sad as a circus-lioness.
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Your red dress,’ she said, and laughed. But I looked at the dress on the floor and it was as if the fire had spread across the room. It was beautiful and it reminded me of something I must do. I will remember I thought. I will remember quite soon now.
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Only the magic and the dream are true — all the rest's a lie.
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As it was in the beginning, ... is now, and ever shall be, world without end.
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One realized all sorts of things. The value of an illusion, for instance, and that the shadow can be more important than the substance. All sorts of things.
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There are always two deaths, the real one and the one people know about.
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You can pretend for a long time, but one day it all falls away and you are alone. We are alone in the most beautiful place in the world.
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I watched her die many times. In my way, not in hers. In sunlight, in shadow, by moonlight, by candlelight. In the long afternoons when the house was empty. Only the sun was there to keep us company. We shut him out. And why not? Very soon she was as eager for what's called loving as I was - more lost and drowned afterwards.
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When he talked his eyes went away from mine and then he forced himself to look straight at me and he began to explain and I knew that he felt very strange with me and that he hated me, and it was funny sitting there and talking like that, knowing he hated me.
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Soon he'll come in again and kiss me, but differently. He'll be different and so I'll be different. It'll be different. I thought, 'It'll be different, different. It must be different.
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And then the days came when I was alone.
Jean Rhys
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I didn't know, I didn't know, I didn't know.
Jean Rhys
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I sit at my window and the words fly past me like birds — with God's help I catch some.
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I found when I was a child that if I put the hurt into words, it would go.
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Quite like old times,' the room says.
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There is no doubt that running away on a fresh, blue morning can be exhilarating.
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