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I think if you can write a play, or produce a play, the first step toward success [is] if people don't want to kill themselves in the lobby. Now there must be four or five other steps, but that's the first.
Jean Kerr
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Jean Kerr
Age: 82 †
Born: 1922
Born: July 10
Died: 2005
Died: January 5
Author
Playwright
Writer
Scranton
Pennsylvania
Bridget Jean Collins
Play
Toward
First
Produce
Must
Steps
Writing
Four
Think
Five
Thinking
Success
Lobby
People
Write
Kill
Firsts
Step
More quotes by Jean Kerr
Movie actors are just ordinary, mixed-up people - with agents.
Jean Kerr
Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he becomes polite.
Jean Kerr
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.
Jean Kerr
I was always the last woman on the last down elevator as the store was closing.
Jean Kerr
The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.
Jean Kerr
Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.
Jean Kerr
A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.
Jean Kerr
Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.
Jean Kerr
I make mistakes I'll be the second to admit it.
Jean Kerr
I have noticed that in plays where the characters on stage laugh a great deal, the people out front laugh very little.
Jean Kerr
I will read anything rather than work.
Jean Kerr
In the beginning, we made the usual mistake of looking at houses we could afford. I am working on a proposition, hereafter to be known as Kerr's law, which states in essence: All the houses you can afford to buy are depressing.
Jean Kerr
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
Jean Kerr
An actor can remember his briefest notice well into senescence and long after he has forgotten his phone number and where he lives.
Jean Kerr
There is this to be said about having money. You get rejected by a higher class of people.
Jean Kerr
Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in!
Jean Kerr
While in some quarters it is felt that the critic is just a necessary evil, most serious-minded, decent, talented theater people agree that the critic is an unnecessary evil.
Jean Kerr
... it's impossible to register any emotion without using some muscle which, in time, will produce a wrinkle. ... By the time she is thirty, a starlet has been carefully taught to smile like a dead halibut. The eyes widen, the mouth drops open, but the eye muscles are never involved.
Jean Kerr
The only reason that they say, 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
Jean Kerr
Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.
Jean Kerr