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A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.
Jean Kerr
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Jean Kerr
Age: 82 †
Born: 1922
Born: July 10
Died: 2005
Died: January 5
Author
Playwright
Writer
Scranton
Pennsylvania
Bridget Jean Collins
Anymore
Finish
Comfortable
Divorce
Wants
Friendly
Jobs
Table
Good
Entirely
Never
Lawyer
Tables
Morticians
Patient
Divorced
More quotes by Jean Kerr
If you can keep your head when all about are losing theirs, it's just possible that you haven't grasped the situation.
Jean Kerr
... it's impossible to register any emotion without using some muscle which, in time, will produce a wrinkle. ... By the time she is thirty, a starlet has been carefully taught to smile like a dead halibut. The eyes widen, the mouth drops open, but the eye muscles are never involved.
Jean Kerr
I will read anything rather than work.
Jean Kerr
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
Jean Kerr
I have noticed that in plays where the characters on stage laugh a great deal, the people out front laugh very little.
Jean Kerr
I was always the last woman on the last down elevator as the store was closing.
Jean Kerr
The only reason that they say, 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
Jean Kerr
Years ago when a man began to notice that if he stood up on the subway he was immediately replaced by two people, he figured he was getting too fat.
Jean Kerr
I think if you can write a play, or produce a play, the first step toward success [is] if people don't want to kill themselves in the lobby. Now there must be four or five other steps, but that's the first.
Jean Kerr
I don't want to see the uncut version of anything.
Jean Kerr
Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.
Jean Kerr
I thought we talked things out!' 'Yes, and you listened very carefully to every word you had to say.
Jean Kerr
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.
Jean Kerr
While in some quarters it is felt that the critic is just a necessary evil, most serious-minded, decent, talented theater people agree that the critic is an unnecessary evil.
Jean Kerr
Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.
Jean Kerr
I think success has no rules, but you can learn a great deal from failure.
Jean Kerr
Man is the only animal that learns by being hypocritical. He pretends to be polite and then, eventually, he becomes polite.
Jean Kerr
I make mistakes I'll be the second to admit it.
Jean Kerr
Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in!
Jean Kerr
Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.
Jean Kerr
