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If you think you're an alcoholic, go to Scotland. You're not an alcoholic. These people are such drunken, toothless hillbillies - I've never seen anything like it. People in Scotland drink while they're drinking.

Jay Mohr

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Jay Mohr
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: August 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Parody
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Never
Drunken
Think
Alcoholic
Thinking
Alcoholics
Like
Scotland
People
Drinking
Drink
Seen
Hillbillies
Anything
Toothless

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What I've realized in the last year, 80% of my act has already happened to me, and it's not until you retell the story at a party or to a friend or it comes up on the podcast that you, I don't know why I'm not doing that onstage!
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I've asked Comedy Central, and they just say, I don't know. It took Showtime two years to put my special on DVD. Owning your own content is the single most important thing in the world.
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If it's going to really make them happy for me to do it, I'll do Walken. I've got no problem with it at all.
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This happens to me every couple of years. I'll look at someone I respect and I'll realize that he's outworking me. It changes the way I behave for the next half decade.
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After spending the last 15 years guest hosting, I couldn't be happier to get the opportunity to host my own show! I'm looking forward to talking sports, connecting with listeners, and interviewing amazing guests every day, while being a part of the FOX Sports Radio family. It was worth the wait.
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I'd go back, yeah. I don't care, I got a kid, man - I'll sell tampons. I mean, there's no selling-out once you get a kid. I got a kid.
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True Yankees are born, not made.
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When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them.
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If you were an actor, anybody could go on Broadway and take a George Carlin hour and do it on stage as a one man show. They're all stand alone essays.
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There seems to be a weird ceiling to being a stand-up as far as acting.
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I don't care about anybody's perception of me except for the audience.
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My radio show, I'd show up, I'd read the data, and I would have sound bites and stuff like that.
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If anyone thinks my show was 'pretty good,' then I've completely failed.
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I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.
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I think stand-up's, the older they get, the better they get.
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