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I think golf is a waste of time and a waste of a sunny afternoon. I also stink at it. I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating.

Jay Mohr

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Jay Mohr
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: August 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Parody
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Thinking
Including
Sunny
Waste
Frustrating
Found
Suit
Also
Afternoon
Anything
Divorce
Never
Suits
Time
Sexual
Harassment
Think
Golf
Stink

More quotes by Jay Mohr

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If a waiter or waitress tells me when gratuity is included they automatically get more gratuity. When they hide it I go with the leg kick.
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There was never a moment in George Carlin's career where he dipped below an A+. When he came out with the Hippie Dippie Weatherman on The Tonight Show, I mean, it seems so mundane now, but it was in black and white TV and the whole bit was that this guy smoked tons of grass and was a terrible weather man. Forecast for tonight? Dark.
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There's not a rocket scientist, not a doctor, not an accountant that 30 years in goes, Oh, now I'm getting it. Now I can't wait to get back out there because I'm better than ever.
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I'm going to eventually shoot my own special, because you have to own your own content. My Turn (2003), that's never been released on DVD.
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Most importantly, how impressive can I be to people that bought tickets, where they never feel, It was pretty good. If anyone thinks my show was pretty good, then I've completely failed. I think every comic should think that.
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True Yankees are born, not made.
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If anyone thinks my show was 'pretty good,' then I've completely failed.
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I'm sure that having acted like an asshole for a great deal of my life, then having played assholes for a good part of my life, created a perception that I'm an asshole.
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I wonder why there is a designated hitter in baseball after all these years? As an experiment, it seemed like a swell enough idea, but you would think the novelty would have worn off by now and everyone would get back to playing baseball.
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I'm oddly not competitive. What I love about show business is there is a home for everyone.
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I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.
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If you think you're an alcoholic, go to Scotland. You're not an alcoholic. These people are such drunken, toothless hillbillies - I've never seen anything like it. People in Scotland drink while they're drinking.
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I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once.
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Unfortunately, there are no mulligans when it comes to pro football contracts.
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You don't have to be Willy Loman about it. But, Airline food is crazy. Hey, what's with these rent-a-cars? or you go up and talk about how Christopher Walken wanted to know where my dog's tail went. That really happened to me.
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There is a lot of acting that is on the table - precisely, good acting. The best movies of mine are the ones that really nobody saw. The Groomsmen, Playing By Heart and Seeing Other People are by far the work I'm the most proud of.
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Yogi Berra put it best, If people don't want to come, we can't stop them.
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Joan Rivers is 80 and she's fantastic. She lives in mortal fear of not filling that 1,500-seat room.
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She's Cherokee Indian, which is great 'cause whenever we have sex, it rains.
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The guy that designed girls' volleyball uniforms definitely never had daughters.
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