Quote

Tomorrow, America's most famous hockey mom, Sarah Palin, will drop the ceremonial first puck at the Philadelphia Flyers game. Right afterwards, she'll get out on the ice and skate around reporters' questions, so it should be interesting.

Jay Leno

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jay Leno
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: April 28
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
New Rochelle
New York
James Douglas Muir Leno
Jay Douglas Muir Leno
James Leno
Right
Tomorrow
Afterwards
Ceremonial
Game
Reporters
Flyers
Games
Hockey
Skate
Interesting
Ice
Puck
Around
Drop
Skates
America
Famous
Sarah
Firsts
Mom
Philadelphia
First
Questions
Palin

More quotes by Jay Leno

Image
The nation's largest savings and loan, Washington Mutual, has become the biggest bank failure in history. See, the problem with the savings and loans? Not enough savings, too many stupid loans, okay In fact, they changed their name from WaMu to 'screw you.'
Jay Leno
Image
According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about women is their eyes. And women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.
Jay Leno
Image
Well, President-elect Barack Obama and his family are gonna spend the holidays in his home state of Hawaii. And you know who couldn't be more thrilled with this? The press, the reporters who follow the president. Well, think about it. After eight years of spending every holiday cutting brush in Crawford, Texas, they get to go to Hawaii!
Jay Leno
Image
Well, it looks like John Boehner will be the new Speaker of the House. He is the son of a bartender, one of 12 children. He grew up in a two room home with just one bathroom, worked his way through school, became the first person in his family to graduate from college. And, sadly, fell in with the wrong crowd and wound up in Congress.
Jay Leno
Image
Congratulations to President Obama on being reelected president of the United States. Turns out it is not all bad news for the Republicans. It seems that depression is covered by Obamacare.
Jay Leno
Image
You know, it shows how old I am. I can remember the good old days when the president picked the Supreme Court justices instead of the other way around.
Jay Leno
Image
President Obama gave a big speech on climate change. He believes global warming is getting worse because apparently he's sweating a lot more during his second term
Jay Leno
Image
And under the new guidelines issued by the Obama Administration, Federal agents will not pursue pot-smoking patients in states that allow medical marijuana. This new policy is called 'Don't Ask, Don't -- What Was I Talking About?'
Jay Leno
Image
In California, 50 women protested the impending war with Iraq by lying on the ground naked and spelling out the word peace. Right idea, wrong president.
Jay Leno
Image
You know what they say when a supermodel gets pregnant? Now she's eating for one.
Jay Leno
Image
I wanted to have a career in sports when I was young, but I had to give up the idea. I'm only six feet tall, so I couldn't play basketball. I'm only 190 pounds, so I couldn't play football, and I have 20/20 vision, so I couldn't be a referee.
Jay Leno
Image
The Houston Astros want to change the name of Enron Field where they play. I guess the Enron name could cause problems for them. Like players could steal a base and then deny it.
Jay Leno
Image
As we head to war with Iraq, President Bush wants to make one thing clear: This war is not about oil. It's about gasoline.
Jay Leno
Image
So, the Phoenix Suns are wearing jerseys written in Spanish, made in China, modeled after their best player, Canadian Steve Nash. There you go. That is America.
Jay Leno
Image
John Kerry suspended his campaign for five days this week in honor of President Reagan. And right now, he's ahead in the polls. How's that make him feel? Disappears for a week and he's up in the polls. What else can he do now but go into hiding.
Jay Leno
Image
The healthcare reform bill now includes a tanning booth tax of 10 percent. You know what this means? This whole thing could be funded by the cast of 'Jersey Shore.'
Jay Leno
Image
How many are worried about a government shutdown? How many are more worried about it starting back up?
Jay Leno
Image
The Senate is now considering increasing government subsidies for corn growers to produce more ethanol. If we produce enough ethanol we can postpone our next invasion of a Middle Eastern country for two to three years.
Jay Leno
Image
Six women have come forward that say Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them without their consent. This proves he would be a hands-on governor.
Jay Leno
Image
As you know President Bush has been traveling around the country trying to sell his new Social Security plan. He wants to take our retirement money and invest it in the stock market. He says nothing can go wrong. I'll mention that to Martha Stewart the next time I see her.
Jay Leno