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It turns out Enron workers were not only shredding documents at work, they were having sex at work. Having sex and shredding documents. Those are two things you don't want to get mixed up.

Jay Leno

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Jay Leno
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: April 28
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
New Rochelle
New York
James Douglas Muir Leno
Jay Douglas Muir Leno
James Leno
Turns
Two
Work
Things
Shredding
Mixed
Documents
Workers
Sex

More quotes by Jay Leno

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Not a good night for President Obama. He lost elections in Virginia, New Jersey, and he's not doing good in Afghanistan either.
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Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up. Say what you want about Trump, at least this guy has his priorities in order. He doesn't want to let actual reality get in the way of his reality show.
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Form 1040 was chosen by the IRS because for every $50 you earn, you get 10 and they get 40.
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After saying the jobs bill is paid for, President Obama now says that it will be paid for by raising taxes over 10 years. I can't figure out if he's the kind of guy who makes infomercials, or the kind of guy who falls for infomercials.
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The White House has now released military documents that they say prove George Bush met his requirements for the National Guard. Big deal, we've got documents that prove Al Gore won the election.
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Courtney Love said she once escorted Kerry to a concert. John Kerry once went out with Courtney Love and he's questioning Bush's judgment.
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According to a new poll, 50 percent of Americans think the country is divided. The other 50 percent think it isn't.
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Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said this week there's a good chance we never get bin Laden. bin Laden! We couldn't even get O.J.!
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For some reason, the Secret Service revealed this, that Sarah Palin's Secret Service code name is 'Denali.' Turns out 'Denali' is an old Eskimo name that means 'Dan Quayle.'
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New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.
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I saw something stupid in the paper today - a new alarm clock that makes no noise. It's for people who don't like loud noises. Instead, it slowly hits you with light and gets brighter and brighter until you wake up. I already have one of those... it's called a window.
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My stockbroker asked me something important today: paper or plastic?
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A lot of American companies are now moving into Iraq. Iraq now has Pizza Hut, Subway, Taco Bell and Popeye's fried chicken. So, great, instead of oil for food, we're giving them oil in food.
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ESPN has announced that they are launching a 3-D sports network. Industry analysts say this will absolutely revolutionize the way Americans don't watch soccer.
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Barack Obama spent his first day as president-elect putting together his transition team. And if you believe MSNBC, by tomorrow he will have chosen all 12 of his disciples.
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It looks like Rudy Giuliani is out of the race. Finally, a Republican with an exit strategy.
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Whitney Houston rear-ended a city bus with her sports car, but no one was hurt. She said she didn't know what happened. One minute she was concentrating on the big white line, and the next, boom!
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I'm a staunch Independant. Every time I think I am a Republican, they do something greedy, and every time I think I am a Democrat, they go and do someting stupid.
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At the airport if you refuse to be patted down, they arrest you. And what's the first thing they do when they arrest you? They pat you down.
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McDonald's announced that it's considering a more humane way of slaughtering its animals. You know they fatten them up and then kill them. You know the same thing they do to their customers, isn't it?
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