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The Houston Astros want to change the name of Enron Field where they play. I guess the Enron name could cause problems for them. Like players could steal a base and then deny it.
Jay Leno
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Jay Leno
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: April 28
Actor
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New Rochelle
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James Douglas Muir Leno
Jay Douglas Muir Leno
James Leno
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More quotes by Jay Leno
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Gray Davis got some good news this week: the Clintons are out here in California campaigning for him. Actually, Hillary is campaigning for Davis, Bill is out here for Larry Flynt.
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My dad's idea of a good time is to go to Sears and walk around.
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President Bush went out touting his economic record in Ohio last week. Now this is a state that lost 225,000 jobs since Bush took office. You know, if Bush wants to tout his record, he should do it somewhere where the Bush economy has actually created jobs, like India, or Thailand, or China.
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The new specialty at the Iowa fair this year is fried butter on a stick. Of course, if you're like me and you want like to eat healthy, get your stick of butter baked.
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Over 6 million people were evacuated from New Jersey ahead of the hurricane. And now, three of them have gone back.
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If there isn't a parking space out front or I can't see my car from the window, we're eating somewhere else.
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I guess we didn't even officially apologize. Jesse Jackson called on the United States to officially apologize to the Chinese. Jesse said, 'An apology is not a sign of weakness.' And as President Clinton has taught us, an apology isn't even a sign you're sorry.
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You see the pictures in the paper today of John Kerry windsurfing? He's at his home in Nantucket this week, doing his favorite thing, windsurfing. Even his hobby depends on which way the wind blows.
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Herman Cain told a group of Occupy Wall Street protesters to go home, get a job, and get a life. That's the Republican version of hope and change, ladies and gentlemen.
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The IRS said today anyone with a refund coming from their 2001 taxes will lose it if they don't pick it up by April 15th. If it is more then three years they will just keep it. How come it doesn't work that way with back taxes?
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Here at work, obviously, I make the most money of anyone on the show, so I try to be the first one here and the last one to leave. I have the crummiest office. I try to balance things out, spread it around.
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There are 249 millionaires in Congress. Remember a couple of years ago when this new Congress told us they had the solution to the recession? Apparently, they didn't share it with the rest of us.
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