Quote

With the presidential debates right around the corner, John Kerry is going to play Mitt Romney to help the President prepare for the debates. That's kind of a stretch a rich white guy from Massachusetts playing a rich white guy from Massachusetts.

Jay Leno

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jay Leno
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: April 28
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Voice Actor
New Rochelle
New York
James Douglas Muir Leno
Jay Douglas Muir Leno
James Leno
President
Corners
Massachusetts
Helping
Debate
Kerry
Around
John
Mitt
Play
Playing
Stretch
Right
Rich
Romney
Going
Guy
Prepare
Kind
Help
Corner
White
Presidential
Debates

More quotes by Jay Leno

Image
Nineteen percent of doctors say that they'd be able to give their patients a lethal injection. But they also went on to say that the patient would have to be really, really behind on payments.
Jay Leno
Image
So, the Phoenix Suns are wearing jerseys written in Spanish, made in China, modeled after their best player, Canadian Steve Nash. There you go. That is America.
Jay Leno
Image
President Bush released his tax returns yesterday. He listed the economy as a liability. He gets to write that off.
Jay Leno
Image
The White House softball team played the pro-marijuana lobbyists' team and lost 25-3. Still no word yet on which side President Obama played for.
Jay Leno
Image
The FDA is now warning people not to eat raw cookie dough this holiday season. Is that how fat we're getting in this country? Our ovens are too slow now?
Jay Leno
Image
AT&T is now offering a new service that allows you to pay your bills through your TV screen by using your remote control. So instead of saying, The check's in the mail, people are going to say, Hey, I wanted to pay, but I couldn't find the remote.
Jay Leno
Image
Here at work, obviously, I make the most money of anyone on the show, so I try to be the first one here and the last one to leave. I have the crummiest office. I try to balance things out, spread it around.
Jay Leno
Image
It looks like President Obama has a new campaign slogan: 'Yes I Did.'
Jay Leno
Image
According to CNN, Donald Rumsfeld said the war in Iraq did not go according to plan. And President Bush said, 'What? We had a plan?'
Jay Leno
Image
They said that President Bush's war in Iraq has cost the former Spanish Prime Minister his job. So President Bush isn't losing American jobs anymore, he's branching out to other countries.
Jay Leno
Image
I was born the day I got my license. When I was a kid, if I wanted to go somewhere and see things, you have to get in your car and actually go.
Jay Leno
Image
For the first time ever, women are scoring higher than men on IQ tests. Scientists say it has something to do with breast implants -- not that it makes the women smarter, it just makes the men dumber.
Jay Leno
Image
How about this John Edwards thing? Imagine that, a personal injury attorney who turns out to be a sleaze ball. Who could have seen that coming?
Jay Leno
Image
For years President Obama has been saying that no one would lose their healthcare plan. Now the White House has admitted that in fact many people will lose their plans. But there is a way to keep the great coverage you have. Just become a member of Congress. Then the taxpayers pay for the whole thing.
Jay Leno
Image
President Bush said it's now time for a change in Iraq and he wants them to have a Western-style democracy like ours. So right now in Iraq, the economy is collapsing, businessmen are corrupt, and Hussein wants his son to take over as president. Sounds like mission accomplished.
Jay Leno
Image
Bush is smart. I don't think that Bush will ever be impeached, 'cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn't you believe him?
Jay Leno
Image
A lot of Congressmen yesterday were upset when Kenneth Lay took the Fifth. Lay said it wasn't his fault. He had planned on testifying, but when Jeffrey Skilling testified, he took all the really good lies.
Jay Leno
Image
Here is a very inexpensive costume idea. Wear a re-elect Obama button and go out as a journalist.
Jay Leno
Image
The NFL draft is going to be this Thursday. That's a huge night for college players. That's the night they start being paid over the table.
Jay Leno
Image
Howard Dean dropped out of the race today. At least he can't claim his voice wasn't heard.
Jay Leno