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The Kingdom of Hereford was unique in the Ununited Kingdoms for having driving tests based on maturity, not age, much to the chagrin of a lot of males, some of whom were still failing to make the grade at thirty-two.

Jasper Fforde

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Jasper Fforde
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: January 11
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
London
England
Failing
Kingdom
Age
Kingdoms
Two
Males
Stills
Thirty
Still
Driving
Chagrin
Much
Tests
Grade
Make
Based
Grades
Unique
Maturity

More quotes by Jasper Fforde

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Humpty had always sat on walls, it was his way.
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If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher.
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If it weren't for greed, intolerance, hate, passion and murder, you would have no works of art, no great buildings, no medical science, no Mozart, no Van Gough, no Muppets and no Louis Armstrong.
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Sometimes, a word succeeds beyond the wildest dreams of its creators, like a virus sent into the world to infect common speech.
Jasper Fforde
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What is there to forgive?. . .Ignore forgive and concentrate on living. Life for you is short far too short to allow small jealousies to infringe on the happiness which can be yours only for the briefest of times.
Jasper Fforde
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Scientific thought - indeed, any mode of thought, whether it be religious or philosophical or anything else - is just like the fashions that we wear - only much longer lived. It's a little like a boy band.
Jasper Fforde
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We all make mistakes at some time in our lives, some more than others. It is only when the cost is counted in human lives that people really take notice.
Jasper Fforde
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A missing arm might ruin your symmetry. Personal asymmetry where I come from is a big taboo and brings great shame on the family and sometimes even the whole village. Do you then have to kill yourself over it or something? Goodness me, no! The family and village just have to learn to be ashamed--and nuts to them for being so oversensitive.
Jasper Fforde
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Have you ever wondered how nostalgia isnt what it used to be?
Jasper Fforde
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You have many fine qualities that I admire. But you are out of time. You should have been born a century ago, when values such as yours meant something.
Jasper Fforde
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Mr. Pewter led them through to a library, filled with thousands of antiquarian books. 'Impressive, eh?' 'Very,' said Jack. 'How did you amass all these?' 'Well,' said Pewter, 'You know the person who always borrows books and never gives them back?' 'Yes...?' 'I'm that person.
Jasper Fforde
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I have the death sentence in seven genres.
Jasper Fforde
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Sometimes I don't know whether I'm thening or nowing.
Jasper Fforde
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History has rewritten itself so many times I'm not really sure how it was to begin with -- it's a bit like trying to guess the original color of a wall when it's been repainted eight times.
Jasper Fforde
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Lesson one in time travel, Thursday. First of all, we are all time travellers. The vast majority of us manage only one day per day.
Jasper Fforde
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Sometimes choice is a luxury that fate does not afford us.
Jasper Fforde
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The safest course was actually the simplest-do nothing at all and hope everything turned out for the best. It wasn't a great plan, but it had the benefits of simplicity and a long tradition.
Jasper Fforde
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I shouldn't believe anything I say, if I were you-and that includes what I just told you.
Jasper Fforde
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He was, after all, the ultimate rebel -- it takes a lot of cojones to stand up to Zeus.
Jasper Fforde
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True and baseless evil is as rare as the purest good - and we all know how rare that is.
Jasper Fforde