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If you even think about asking Harry Potter for an autograph, your day ends right now.

Jasper Fforde

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Jasper Fforde
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: January 11
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
London
England
Ends
Right
Even
Autograph
Think
Autographs
Thinking
Potter
Potters
Harry
Asking

More quotes by Jasper Fforde

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Lesson one in time travel, Thursday. First of all, we are all time travellers. The vast majority of us manage only one day per day.
Jasper Fforde
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How fishy on the fishiness scale? Ten is a stickleback and one is a whale shark. A whale isn't a fish, Thursday. A whale shark is--sort of. All right, it's as fishy as a crayfish. A crayfish isn't a fish. A starfish, then. Still not a fish. This is a very odd conversation, Thursday.
Jasper Fforde
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Aspects that we consider normal today could very well be repugnant in the future - eating animals, for one thing, or abundant choice, or invasive surgery. I was simply trying to demonstrate that what is acceptable today may not be acceptable forever, and vice-versa.
Jasper Fforde
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You see? I know where every single book used to be in the library. She pointed to the shelf opposite. Over there was Catch-22, which was a hugely popular fishing book and one of a series, I believe.
Jasper Fforde
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If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher.
Jasper Fforde
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He was, after all, the ultimate rebel -- it takes a lot of cojones to stand up to Zeus.
Jasper Fforde
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Individual words, sounds, squiggles on paper with no meanings other than those with which our imagination can clothe them.
Jasper Fforde
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Mr. McGregor's a nasty piece of work, isn't he? Quite the Darth Vader of children's literature.
Jasper Fforde
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Apart from the faint odor of ink that pervaded the scene, it might have been real.
Jasper Fforde
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A missing arm might ruin your symmetry. Personal asymmetry where I come from is a big taboo and brings great shame on the family and sometimes even the whole village. Do you then have to kill yourself over it or something? Goodness me, no! The family and village just have to learn to be ashamed--and nuts to them for being so oversensitive.
Jasper Fforde
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People who read my books have an open mind when it comes to new, bizarre, interesting and exciting ideas.
Jasper Fforde
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The government was to raise the duty on cheese to 83 percent, an unpopular move that would doubtless have the more militant citizens picketing cheese shops.
Jasper Fforde
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Yes, and imagine a world where there were no hypothetical situations.
Jasper Fforde
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Her majesty is one verb short of a sentence.
Jasper Fforde
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Growth purely for its own sake is the philosophy of cancer.
Jasper Fforde
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Palindrome as well. My sister's name is Hannah. Father liked word games. He was fourteen times World Scrabble Champion. When he died, we buried him at Queenzieburn to make use of the triple word score.
Jasper Fforde
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I don't need you to agree with me, she said quietly. I'll go away happy with a little bit of doubt. Doubt is good. It's an emotion we can build on. Perhaps if we feed it with curiosity it will blossom into something useful, like suspicion - and action.
Jasper Fforde
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I didn't set out to discover a truth. I was actually sent to the Outer Fringes to conduct a chair census and learn some humility. But the truth inevitably found me, as important truths often do, like a lost thought in need of a mind.
Jasper Fforde
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Pretend to be mad and talk a lot. Then — and this is the important bit — do nothing at all until you absolutely have to and then make sure everyone dies.
Jasper Fforde
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The Kingdom of Hereford was unique in the Ununited Kingdoms for having driving tests based on maturity, not age, much to the chagrin of a lot of males, some of whom were still failing to make the grade at thirty-two.
Jasper Fforde