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I've got six months to sort out the hackers, get the Japanese knotweed under control and find an acceptable form of narcissus.

Jasper Fforde

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Jasper Fforde
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: January 11
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
London
England
Find
Japanese
Acceptable
Six
Garden
Months
Control
Narcissus
Sort
Hackers
Form
Gardening

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Fiction wouldn't be much fun without its fair share of scoundrels, and they have to live somewhere.
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For a taste that's a bit more distinct, eat a bird before it's extinct.
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Dead. Never been that before. Not even once.
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Lesson one in time travel, Thursday. First of all, we are all time travellers. The vast majority of us manage only one day per day.
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Don't ever call me mad, Mycroft. I'm not mad. I'm just ... well, differently moraled, that's all.
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I've managed to bring the backlog down to a mere sixty-eight years, she announced with some small sense of achievement. I hope to be able to start marking the papers of pupils who are still alive by the end of the decade.
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Love isn't sensible, Red. I think that's the point.
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The government was to raise the duty on cheese to 83 percent, an unpopular move that would doubtless have the more militant citizens picketing cheese shops.
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To a great extent, I still write for myself, write what amuses me. Fortunately, I have a quirky sort of strange sense of humor that appeals to other people and that's good. I still sort of write for myself though there are some areas of the book I feel I have to put in and I feel I have to deliver.
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Agents and publishers only want one thing - good writing.
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Have you ever wondered how nostalgia isnt what it used to be?
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Words are like leaves,. . .like people really, fond of their own society.
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Don't move, said Sprockett.Mimes don't generally attack unless they are threatened.
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He set fire to some potatoes, then cooked some undelivered post in the embers. - Dad Did he now? What a strange fellow. I would have done it the other way around. - Stafford
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Writing needs to be practiced there is a limit to how much can be gleaned from a teacher or a manual. The true essence of writing is out there, in the world, and inside, within yourself. To write, you have to give.
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I've never been averse to a little risk - after all, writing without risk is not really writing at all. Sometimes one has to just let fly with a high concept piece and see where the pieces fall. As it generally turns out, the central story is familiar, but just with different rules of engagement.
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Sometimes I don't know whether I'm thening or nowing.
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Edward, Edward, he said with a patronising smile, there are no unanswered questions of any relevance. Every question that we need to ask has been answered fully. If you can't find the correct answer then you are obviously asking the wrong question.
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Do I have to talk to insane people? You're a librarian now. I'm afraid it's mandatory.
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If it's a chimera alert, we just follows the screams.
Jasper Fforde