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I collect ex-boyfriends -- and more than five, at last count.

Jasper Fforde

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Jasper Fforde
Age: 63
Born: 1961
Born: January 11
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
London
England
Five
Lasts
Last
Boyfriends
Exes
Collect
Count

More quotes by Jasper Fforde

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How fishy on the fishiness scale? Ten is a stickleback and one is a whale shark. A whale isn't a fish, Thursday. A whale shark is--sort of. All right, it's as fishy as a crayfish. A crayfish isn't a fish. A starfish, then. Still not a fish. This is a very odd conversation, Thursday.
Jasper Fforde
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The safest course was actually the simplest-do nothing at all and hope everything turned out for the best. It wasn't a great plan, but it had the benefits of simplicity and a long tradition.
Jasper Fforde
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If it's a chimera alert, we just follows the screams.
Jasper Fforde
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Sometimes choice is a luxury that fate does not afford us.
Jasper Fforde
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Were you listening to a word I said ' 'I kind of switched off when you drew breath.
Jasper Fforde
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I have the death sentence in seven genres.
Jasper Fforde
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Edward, Edward, he said with a patronising smile, there are no unanswered questions of any relevance. Every question that we need to ask has been answered fully. If you can't find the correct answer then you are obviously asking the wrong question.
Jasper Fforde
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Marriage, like spinach and opera, was something I had never thought I would like.
Jasper Fforde
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The name is Schitt, he replied. Jack Schitt.
Jasper Fforde
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Don't ever call me mad, Mycroft. I'm not mad. I'm just ... well, differently moraled, that's all.
Jasper Fforde
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Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.
Jasper Fforde
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You have many fine qualities that I admire. But you are out of time. You should have been born a century ago, when values such as yours meant something.
Jasper Fforde
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He set fire to some potatoes, then cooked some undelivered post in the embers. - Dad Did he now? What a strange fellow. I would have done it the other way around. - Stafford
Jasper Fforde
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Marriage is an honorable estate and should not be used simply as an excuse for legal intercourse.
Jasper Fforde
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Librarying is a harder profession than the public realizes, he said. People think it's all rubber stamps, knowing that Dewey 521 is celestial mechanics and saying 'Try looking under fiction' sixty eight times a day.
Jasper Fforde
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Sorry, [Hamlet] said, rubbing his temples. I don't know what came over me. All of a sudden I had this overwhelming desire to talk for a very long time without actually doing anything.
Jasper Fforde
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Reading, I had learned, was as creative a process as writing, sometimes more so. When we read of the dying rays of the setting sun or the boom and swish of the incoming tide, we should reserve as much praise for ourselves as for the author. After all, the reader is doing all the work - the writer might have died long ago.
Jasper Fforde
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If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher.
Jasper Fforde
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Apart from the faint odor of ink that pervaded the scene, it might have been real.
Jasper Fforde
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Religion isn't the cause of wars, it's the excuse.
Jasper Fforde