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I don't want my readers slowed down by long passages of narrative.
Janet Evanovich
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Janet Evanovich
Age: 81
Born: 1943
Born: April 22
Novelist
Writer
South River
New Jersey
Steffie Hall
Slowed
Passages
Readers
Narrative
Reader
Long
More quotes by Janet Evanovich
I don't know if it's a good idea to give a woman a box of bullets when she's got a pimple.
Janet Evanovich
I almost never shoot people.
Janet Evanovich
You gonna take the case? It's not a case. It's a missing person. Sort of. You're gonna have a devil of a time finding him if it was aliens, Grandma said.
Janet Evanovich
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. this is it, he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep.this car has protective qualities You mean like a guardian angel? I mean, like, it has seatbelts
Janet Evanovich
Your life isn't out of control. It's expanded.
Janet Evanovich
I shot that sucker right in the gumpy. Grandma Mazur
Janet Evanovich
Who's the best person you know. Of all the people you know personally, is there anyone who has a sense of right and wrong and lives by it? This was a sticky question because it would have to be Ranger ...but I suspected he occasionally killed people. Only bad people, of course, but still...
Janet Evanovich
How many times have I told you not to hit people in the face. You kick them in the body where it doesn't show.
Janet Evanovich
What's this outfit? You can't afford clothes? Are you wearing other peoples? Helen Plum
Janet Evanovich
Have you eaten?' I asked Diesel. When?' Recently.' No.
Janet Evanovich
Has it ever occurred to you that you might be delusional?' That's what the psychiatrist said, but I think he's wrong. There's an evil flying pizza out there, and it's got Brenda's name on it.
Janet Evanovich
Just because i know how to change a guys oil doesn't mean i want to spend the rest of my life on my back, staring up his undercarriage.
Janet Evanovich
Morelli beeped his truck unlocked. “If you’re looking for your rent-a-cop, I told Ranger you’d be with me this morning.” “Did he make you take a blood oath that you’d protect me?” “He asked me if I had adequate health insurance.
Janet Evanovich
Make sure your main characters are likeable. They can be flawed, but your readers need to be able to root for them.
Janet Evanovich
When something needs to be ironed I put it in the ironing basket. If a year goes by and the item is still in the basket I throw the item away. This is a good system since eventually I end up only with clothes that don’t need ironing.
Janet Evanovich
When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said: She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank.
Janet Evanovich
I failed math twice, never fully grasping probability theory. I mean, first off, who cares if you pick a black ball or a white ball out of the bag? And second, if you’re bent over about the color, don’t leave it to chance. Look in the damn bag and pick the color you want.
Janet Evanovich
I'd kiss you, but you smell like a gym bag.
Janet Evanovich
I don't mean to change the subject or anything, but have you tried concealer on that zit? Cynthia Lotte - Hot Six
Janet Evanovich
I'm so busy writing and editing two books a year that I don't have time for painting anymore.
Janet Evanovich